11/10/2008 04:35:00 AM

Chris Lavoie, producer of Stephanie Miller's radio show, has blown his top over California's Propositions 2 and 8.
Proposition 2 passed, requiring chicken farmers to treat their product with a modicum of humanity. Even a fuckstick Nazi like Michael the Wiener-Savage supported this prop.
Proposition 8 also passed, making homosexual marriage unconstitutional in the State of California.
Now, it sucks that Prop 8 passed. But to conflate this with Prop 2 is absolute idiocy. And this is exactly what Lavoie has been doing all week: bitching about people who think chickens deserve rights, but homosexuals don't.
Steph and Jim Ward have appealed to Chris' sensibilities - but he's stubbornly equating the two measures' fundamentals.
Now, why do I really care about Chris Lavoie's illogical argument? I suppose it's the final straw in my building anger against his work, and an excuse to blog about it.
First of all, Lavoie's reliance on two listeners' daily voice sampling submissions pisses me off. Sorry, Listener DJ and Shane O, but I'm not paying for the StephCast service so I can hear several minutes of your stale, formulaic "comedy" every goddammed hour.
Secondly, Lavoie has a tendency to call everyone with which he disagrees an idiot. In a very serious, non-funny way. If I wanted humorless name-calling, I'd tune into Limbaugh et al.
And finally, Lavoie insists on staying in the closet, which is a huge insult to us listeners. Obviously we don't look down on homosexuality, and to have someone so obviously gay conceal his identity from us tells us (a) our progressiveness is not trusted, and (b) we're not smart enough to know who we're listening to.
Lavoie is the salesman with a bad wig feeding us a line of total bullshit. We can afford the good car... stop touting the lemon, take off that silly wig (beard?), and level with us for a change.
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11/10/2008 02:20:00 AM

Everyone’s talking about Karl Rove and Mitch McConnell being pushed into obscurity; being the “biggest losers” of this obvious pro-Obama mandate. But there are others facing irrelevance. And someone has to break the news to them. So here goes:
Dear Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, et al,
Haven’t you realized you are the primary reason your party is now a regional party at best?
Blame Palin all you want; the facts state otherwise. When your two least favorite candidates became the GOP’s two final candidates for Republican nominee (Limbaugh et al hate John McCain and Mike Huckabee), did you actually fail to recognize most Republicans disagree with your viewpoints?
Dear The McLaughlin Group,
Your pre-taped discussions are a toaster-oven in today’s microwave world.
During the final weeks of the Hillary Clinton/Barack Obama contest, you were so out of sync with the streaming news cycle it was pitiful. This morning – just a few minutes ago – your synopsis of Obama’s victory was off my 1.5 million votes (McLaughlin actually posted the words "64 million"; those of us with a pulse know that figure passed 65 million over 24 hours ago, and will probably pass 66 million before it's all over), and fifteen electoral votes. Did you record your program so long ago NORTH CAROLINA WAS NOT YET KNOWN? Holy LAZINESS, Batman!
But your pundits are dinosaurs as well, and obviously equally unfit for the changing times. I got more accurate predictions from websites and up-to-date commercial cable networks – even FOX News -- than I did from your early 20th century personalities.
The weekend before the election your liberal “experts” predicted the election would be “close,” and that bimbo Monica Crowley actually predicted McCain would win by half a percentage point!
Dear Saturday Night Live,
You can thank one person for your recent surge in viewership: Tina Fey. But the election’s over, Fey’s back at her regular job, and we’re all rightfully expecting you to again become the unfunny, irrelevant crap you've been for several years now.
You know, Mad TV without all the editing.
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11/05/2008 12:19:00 PM
11/03/2008 11:37:00 AM
- It's the opposite of satire -
For all the admirable traits one might possess, there are those to which he or she will never come close. In the case of Ben Affleck, comedic dexterity is one such untenable trait.
Ben Affleck's over-the-top Olbermann routine on SNL last night was funny at first, but quickly unraveled into some desperate, over-the-top, Monster Truck-like screechfest. I initially thought he was trying to lay down some decent satire; he started off rather subdued. But as the skit progressed I saw it becoming more and more absurd, and finally I realized I was witnessing a popping of the imitation-inflation bubble that Dana Carvey and others so effectively flirt with, but never burst.
Consider the impressionist: the comedian whose imitation finds a broad line between reality and exaggeration, and pushes its edges. Dana Carvey, an SNL cast member from fifteen years back, was a master at it. In his "McLaughlin Group" spoofs, he would amplify his impersonation of the grumpy PBS host, John McLaughlin, right up to the point of oversaturation, and then pull it back just a bit. "WRONG!" he'd belt at (the portrayers of) Jack Germond or Eleanor Clift, and then roll into an exaggerated description of the range of his next question's "1 to 10" scale. Most of Carvey's character imitations pushed beyond subtlety, but as he himself once pointed out his were not simply impersonations, but impressions. Exaggeration is part of the formula.
Contrast this with the satirist's domain. His is a much tougher balancing act (I never quite got it down; see this page or this other one for a couple examples of my satirist days), and usually only effectively done by the true masters. Effective satire fools many audience members -- think This is Spinal Tap, a movie whose theater success was smothered by the fact many thought it was a real documentary about a rock band they'd never heard of. Not exactly the place for satire, you won't see it too often coming from SNL.
And, in terms of comedic delivery, Affleck was all over the map. Like a blind man trying to land a C-5 on an aircraft carrier.
As the sketch passed its halfway point, Affleck jumped overboard, head first, flailing and twitching and emoting to a point that apparently made a lot of the audience uncomfortable -- there's plenty of heavy laughing, but notably only by a fraction of the audience.
Overdoing exaggeration in character impressionism is like cooking up a great pot of chili, but then adding waaaay too much salt. There's really nothing you can do once you've exceeded a recipe's maximum allowable salinity level.
Obviously the sort of right winger who regularly watches fake wrestling and bass fishing TV shows will have found the impression hilarious, but I have to wonder why SNL has never done such a warped exaggeration of Bill Orally, Rush Limbaugh or Sean Hannity. Is Olbermann really considered that far out, whereas O'Reilly, Rump Leakage, and Hannity are not? If so, why is Olbermann outrating Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity these days? Why hasn't Limbaugh ever had a successful TV show (remember, Limbaugh has miserably failed in his attempts to attract a TV audience)?
In reality it was just another oversaturated impression by someone ill-equipped to try this sort of thing. Ben Affleck is not exactly the sharpest comedic knife in the drawer.
Olbermann thinks the routine was hilarious (or, at least, he says so) -- maybe he's doing a Sarah Palin and pretending the skewering didn't offend him. The most likely scenario has Olbermann a bit offended by the routine, though smart enough to realize the value of a good roasting. As we all know, regardless how devastating it was, the skit has elevated Olbermann to the status of someone imitated on SNL -- an acknowledgment of his cultural importance.
Watch out, Chris Matthews, there's a new Sheriff in MSNBC-ville.
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11/01/2008 11:53:00 AM
10/26/2008 12:16:00 PM
10/24/2008 10:59:00 AM
Pensacola is the reddest of GOP-lovin' towns in Florida, and it'll probably vote 2/3 in favor of Johnny Senile and Sarah McNuts. But seven thousand openly Democratic Pensacolians is a big day for the world.
Naturally, I take credit for this development. Well, one seven-thousandth the credit: my mom was one of the proudly pro-Obama Pensacolians to support our next First Lady. All these years of my pointing out the obvious defects of Monkey Boy and his evil administration have made a difference.
Actually, Mom knew W was a monkey the day she first witnessed him mangle the English language. But at least now she's proudly bearing her political stripes on the outside. In Pensacola. Like thousands of others... supporting a black man. This is a big deal.

When I was a kid, three of Pensacola's (then) four public high schools were forcibly desegregated. We're talking the early 1970s. The KKK rallied at Escambia High School, during the Carter administration, to protest this desegregation (and the renaming of the school's mascot from 'Rebel' to 'Gator'). So just imagine how backwards things must've been during the 50s and 60s. When Mom was a kid.
Not long ago you'd be in trouble if you had to find a white southerner talking positive about black Democrats. Political correctness in Dixie runs... that is, used to run counter to the model Limbaugh et al constantly lament.
And Barack Obama is changing that.
Now it's your turn. Talk to your parents, your grandparents, aunts and uncles. They're not as grumpy as you might think.
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10/13/2008 07:46:00 AM
- Unlike Bill Ayers, G. Gordon Liddy is a convict. A federally-convicted felon, he spent four years in prison before (incredulously, no doubt) being pardoned by Jimmy Carter.
The significance is this - Liddy is a close friend of John McCain's.
What's really sick is Liddy hosts a popular talk show from a DC-area radio station. The entire right wing pals around with domestic terrorists.
But you already knew that.

